How do you stop a pedophile from following you? Throw a fridge at him

What happens when you try to hand feed a shark You have one less hand

A blonde is running for her life and sees a sign that says "GO LEFT TO SURVIVE". She goes right and she survives.

There once was a mathematician, a physicist and an engineer in a room without an exit. The ceiling catches fire. They all die.

What time did the tennis start? Tennish

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 6 cheated on 7 with 9.. 6 is now a victim of domestic violence.

What's worse than being hit by a mini van? Being hit by 5 mini vans.

Q) what's black and white and red all over? A) a slaughtered zebra.

Knock knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Bob Matthews.

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

who has no significant other or personal life? who ever is on anti-joke.com

Gracias por depositar mi dinero, y tener un buen día, adios.

Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well no one really knows for sure

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

Why did the bunny eat his food

I have glasses but cannot see I have feet but cannot walk What am I? A riddle.

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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