What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

Canada

Nobody cares.

Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

Christopher Walken to a bar.

how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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