Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

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Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

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How do you make Sasuke cry? Kill his family

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There was a baby, and it wouldnt stop crying. So the mom shook it and shook it. Then it stopped crying.

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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What did the Anti-Semitic man say to the Jewish man beside him? Hello.

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

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What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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A moose walks into a grocery store, he asks the deer where he could find some bisquits, the deer says "oh it's in aigle 6." So the moose goes to aigle 6...and there ain't no bisquits!

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A duck flies to someone's backyard pool. Moments later it takes a dump , then suddenly flies away.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

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Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

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What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

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A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

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Nipples+poop= good stuff. Hellllll yeaaahhhh

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Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

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austins gay lolololol

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Q: What did one poor guy say to the other poor guy? A: We're both black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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