Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

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Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

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Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a big fat bully!

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The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

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brett is a dick

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

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why is nick a dumb ass? because hes not a smart ass

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asparagus

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A man walked into a bar, he was extremely short sighted, after this occurence he decided to phone up the opticians to get some glasses.

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A: Knock, Knock! B: Who's there? A: Boo B: Boo, who? A: Don't cry, it's only me!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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