what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

Yo momma so stupid that she went to get a college degree from a community college and along with her education now has a greater opportunity to earn money with that knowledge.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

baby loves lalma

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

Roses are red-ish Violets are blue-ish If it weren't for Jesus we'd all be jewish

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

The Treatment of Steve Bartman

Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...