Two guys walk into a bar, they are both alchoholics and beat their wives.

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A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

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How many dull people does it take to replace a lightbulb? One.

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A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

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What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

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Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

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What do black people eat for breakfast? Cereal.

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Why do you walk to your bed at night? Beds cant walk.

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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Knock knock Who's there? Gung chee Gung chee who? That's my full name.

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Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interupting cow Interu--- MOOOOOO!!

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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K

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Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

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Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

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what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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How long does it take for a Jew to die being gased. Same as anyone else.

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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