what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

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A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

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Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

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What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

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The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

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That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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What do you call an amazing, funny, beautiful, nice, goreous, stunning girl? Adena Gabrysiak <3

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What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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Take my wife- to the store.

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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Why is Alex Mann Fat? Because he doesnt eat healthy food.

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What's the difference between two black people? Ones a little mocha caramel.

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Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

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Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

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What do yo call four Jewish guys sitting around doing nothing? The Sabbath Day

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What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

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Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

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The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

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4,000 yaks escaped from the zoo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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