A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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What's naughty and rhymes with CORN? Naughty corn.

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So dont touch it

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tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

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A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

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Yo momma eats healthy, exercises regularly and is likely in decent physical condition.

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Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

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AHHHHHHH OMGOMG OMG I SAY TO MY MUM SHE RUNS INTO THE ROOM SCREEMING AND SAYS WHAT HAPPEND I SAY ....................... i forgot now (k.c)

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What did the old man say? Nothing he was so old he died.

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Knock Knock *no answer* Knock Knock *Genevieve enters the house with curiosity and is later charged with Breaking and Entering*

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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How do you get a clown of a swing set U hit it with an ax 2.5 times

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asparagus

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Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

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What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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