Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

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DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

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Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

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How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

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Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her statement.

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A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

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What do you call a thirsty girl? H2Hoe

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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What do you get if you cross a black man with a sword? A dead black man

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Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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