What has nine arms and sucks? An appendage-rich octopus with an inhaling habit.

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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It's long!

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Why are there no Mexican people on Star Trek? Because the casting director screened thousands of actors and actresses and assembled what he/she felt was the most talented cast to create and sustain a long running television series. Unfortunately no one of Mexican dissent was awarded a role.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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i had a bowl of soup and it was 5 inches in diameter and 3 inches tall. how much soup did i eat? very little because i drank most of it

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I can't think of a joke!

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. The female body inspectors? No, the female bawdy inspectors.

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What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

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Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

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What do you call poop in a black man's toilet? Poop.

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? I don't Know, but we should inform the RSPCA.

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

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a man walked out of church and said F***!

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The phantom menace is the best star wars movie

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Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

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There once was a mathematician, a physicist and an engineer in a room without an exit. The ceiling catches fire. They all die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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