a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? Google it!

I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

Struggling with self esteem? Wish you were more attractive? Well stop wishing you fugly cum dumpster.

Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

Whats the difference between a van with a bunch of babies in the back and a Cadillac with a bunch of babies in the back I don't have a Cadillac in my garage

Roses are red, violets are blue, I ate your horse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

I grammer is gooder then yours.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

Why did the Chicken commit suicide Because he Ms. Reed

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a joke.

That awkward moment when the moment isn't awkward.

monkey sponge

Whats big, ugly, and sucks? Death.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

What's white and looks like a refrigerator? A baseball

man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

What's worse than getting a detention? Slavery...just kidding that was a good thing!

Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga A: You pokerface

What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

Men's rights.

yo momma is so tall shes tall

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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