Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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What did one wall say to the other? Walls don't talk.

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What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

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What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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Why was Timmy sad?

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What is big and white, not the moon CC

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey pal, why the long face?" The horse neighed.

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Why couldn't the 1 year old talk? It's a 1 year old, idiot, it can't!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

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2

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Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

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The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

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roses are green violets are red im shooting heroine into my head

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Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

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A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. He says, "I am what I am." The white guy says, "yes." The black guy says, "why did you say yes?" If he was black he would have said, "I is what I is.":):):):):):):):)<3

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womens rights

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A man is eating a sandwich. He is promptly shot in the face.

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Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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