Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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A man entered into a house, because it hadn't any door.

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What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

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96

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When is a bus not a bus? When it explodes.

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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Society.

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If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

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Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

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roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

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Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

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A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops