Barack Obama

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Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

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The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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poop

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

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I farted once. Haiti took the brunt of it.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

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Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

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What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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Q: What did Gaddafi get for Christmas? A: Brain Surgery

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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