Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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Women's football

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

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What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

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Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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Christopher Walken to a bar.

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How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

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What did the boy do when he got locked out his house go on anti joke and make a stupid joke about him being locked out

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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