What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

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anne hatthaway

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

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what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

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poop

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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A 36 year old Canadian woman.

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roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

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What's naughty and rhymes with CORN? Naughty corn.

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Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

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You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

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Ryan Chang is funny.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

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Q: What did Gaddafi get for Christmas? A: Brain Surgery

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Why can't woman be cokcy? Because that don't have one (Sorry for the sexist joke, to who it may concern)

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What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

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What do JFK and Hitler have in common? They died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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