The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

How much does a mexican immigrant get paid? Less an minimum wage.

What did the man say when he turned on his car? AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" So the horse says, "My ex-wife just got full custody of my kids and I'll never see them again."

Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

Yo momma eats healthy, exercises regularly and is likely in decent physical condition.

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

Q. Why did the man fall off his bike? A. He was hit by a canoe.

A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

As if it helps your self esteem: Nothing yet, Be the first to comment.

tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

Knock Knock Bark, Bark, Bark, Bark, YELP! Whimper Whimper... Hey man, come on in.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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