Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

why is nick a dumb ass? because hes not a smart ass

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from their camps

What happened to the man that took too much viagra? His erection lasted longer than 4 hours, he's dead now

What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

Why didn't the black man have a job? He was only in first grade.

How did Jonny die We don't know he was never found

Why did 6 hook up with 7 ?

Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

Greg told a joke. It wasnt funny...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

Your mom

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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