Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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who farted your mother

What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake!

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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MOAR??

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