robin, get in the car.

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

Q: Why was the blonde in a black car? A: Becasue the car was a herse and she was killed a week before in an accident where the other driver was drunk Becasue his wife had left him with no money and no kids to come home to.

What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

2

The 19th Amendment

Haikus can be fun But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

How did Ronald McDonald die? He was hit by a big mac

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike?.. She was 4 and hadn't learned how to ride a bike yet... Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?.. It was stapled to the first monkey... Why was Suzie angry?.. Her parents had only found one bike at the marketplace... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?.. It thought it was a game... Why did the fridge fall out of the tree?.. It had no arms... Lucy fall off her bike?.. She was crushed by 3 monkeys and a fridge... There's 500 bricks on a plane and you throw one out, how many are left?.. 499 bricks... How do you get an elephant into a fridge?.. Open the fridge, take the elephant out, close the fridge... How do you get a deer into a fridge?.. Open the fridge, take the elephant out, close the fridge... The lion is celebrating his birthday and, being the king of the jungle, all the other animals were in attendance except for one... Why?.. The deer was in the fridge... Little Mia is looking for Lucy and comes across an alligator-infested river... How does she cross it?... She swam... The alligators are at the lion's party... She died anyways, though... What happened?.. A brick fell on her head... Why did Suzie fall off the swing?.. She was trampled by the elephant, who was in a hurry to get to the lion's party in time... Why did the ethologist couple commit suicide?.. Their 3 daughters there killed by a brick, an elephant and 3 dead monkeys followed by a fridge... Note: yeah not 100% original, i mixed some already existing jokes together... works better if you don't tell them all at once but sprinkle them in with lots of other unrelated jokes...

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

Whats funnier than 24? 25

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Yo momma eats healthy, exercises regularly and is likely in decent physical condition.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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