What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

This isn't a joke, but I'm going to ruin the fun of this site by clicking the thumbs up until I one day get onto the first page.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

my mom raped yerr foot

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

Why are oranges blue? Wait there orange... right

How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

Billy isn't a homosexual, he just has sex with men. Billy has sex with men, because Billy's in prison.

What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

Your mother

roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

YOLO MAH BROLO

Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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