Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

thumb_up thumb_down +24

roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

thumb_up thumb_down +22

hey.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The shark replies i dont have cancer just a terrible drinking problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

stop it ryan vallee

thumb_up thumb_down +22

You want to hear a joke? Adobe Flash Player.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats the worst part about being fat? Your fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

2 snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.... ba dooom chesh

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

gay rights

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops