It's kind of hard to die when you're in a freezer.

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Why did the man spill his coffee on his daughter? Because he is dying from Mad Cow disease so his hand experienced a traumatic spasm.

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How many pieces of bling does it take to ruin a rap song? Just Two Chainz

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What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

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aggie wilkinson, i WOULD!!!!!

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

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A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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A. I have a really funny knock knock joke to tell you! You start. B. Knock knock A. Who's there? B. ....

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

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What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

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what's faster than a snail? Usain Bolt

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

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Why did the Nigger fuck shit? He was a shit fucking Nigger.

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

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Light Yagami. I'm a gay light bulb :D

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had alopecia.

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What's the difference between John Candy and Chris Farley? Nothing. They're both dead.

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what is stupid and reading this you

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What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

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Timmy heard that Red Bull gives you wings. He drank one and waited. No wings. He drank another and waited. No wings. Timmy drank 3 cases of Red Bull trying to get wings. Timmy died. The end.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

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What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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