man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

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Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

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dfghfgdfhfdhfgdfghdfh

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did you know the leading cause of funerals is death?

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My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

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What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

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Knock knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Bob Matthews.

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What do you call a drunk cannibalistic Jew? A HeBrew!

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all walked into a bar. But, the bartender was not happy, as he had noticed that each of them were wearing tops with rude slogans on them. The Bartender said to the Englishman, "you do know that your t-shirt isn't suitable for the children in here, don't you?" "Oh," said the Englishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home to change it at once." Next, came the Irishman, who's top was slightly worse than the Englishman's. The bartender said to the Irishman, "you do know that the joke on your jumper is sexist, don't you?" "Oh," said the Irishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home and change it at once." Last, was the Scotsman. The Scotsman's top was particularly bad, and the bartender especially did not want this top to be seen in his bar. So, the bartender said to the Scotsman, "you do know that the slogan on your cardigan is racist, don't you?" "Oh," said the scotsman, "I'll go home and change it at once."

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How do you leave a gay guy in suspense? How? ......................

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Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

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What did the black man do when i shit in he's pant? Changed pants.

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What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

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Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

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Q: Why couldn't the hippopotamus get his driver's license? A: He didn't turn 16 yet.

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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Why do I hate Jews? - Because they use to much space in the oven.

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children driving off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Why did the baby cross the road? It doesn't matter. He was hit by a bus.

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

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Friend: I hope you burn in hell -.- Me: I hope you step on a leggo in the dark Friend: *gasp* take that back

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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