What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What's worse than hearing another Holocaust anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

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How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

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Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

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The Bible

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what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

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A drunk man walks out of a bar, goes home and abuses his wife.

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I farted once. Haiti took the brunt of it.

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The 19th Amendment

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I can't stand 9/11 jokes Their just plane wrong!

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Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

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What do you call a black man in the olympics? An olympian.

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As if it helps your self esteem: Nothing yet, Be the first to comment.

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a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

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How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

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Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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