what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

Once upon a time, a story teller used the "once upon a time" metaphor in order to tell you your parents have died in a terrible accident

What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

What's brown and sticky? Poo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...