If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs? A: Probably right where you left him, since animals with no appendages have no way of mobility

thumb_up thumb_down +29

(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

So these IRS agents were negotiating a deal.....

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was Timmy sad?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

thumb_up thumb_down +27

if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

42.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

69

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops