What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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women

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what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

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A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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What do you call a wine-o? A Alco-colic.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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"Up to 50% off."

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Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

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what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

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Where's my tractor?

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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whats the difference between a rapist and a pedophile? the racist has his own whistle

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

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Why was the baby crying? Because a tree fell on its legs.

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what is a big jar and has a human in it? A human in a jar.

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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