How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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So dont touch it

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what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

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your a towel.

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Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

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Chuck Norris

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

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What do you call a gay man flying an aeroplane? A pilot.

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Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

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Q:Whats funny? A:Genocide

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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How many pieces of bling does it take to ruin a rap song? Just Two Chainz

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nine...eleven

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girls are a lot like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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How did the fat man die? Type 2 diabetes

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

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What do you call a black man with a group of 5 white guys? Friends. What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys? a diffrent ratio of black and white friends.

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Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because he is real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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