How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

69

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the girl say to the guy raping her? Stop.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why do the piglets have their heads down low? Because they are ashamed that their mom is fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why do white people despise black people? Because they are good at everything we suck at.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

h

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Ass

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops