Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

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Mr. Burns sex scandal.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

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What is a question?

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A Horse walks into a Bar The Bartender runs for his life as he is tripping on acid and believes the horse is a sheep. He doesn't like sheep.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

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A Christian, a Jew and a Muslim fly in an airplane. They all reach safely to their destination and have a lovely vacation.

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A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

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What's meaner than taking candy from a baby? Throwing the baby off a cliff.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

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Justin Bieber

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h

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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