Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

Nah

Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

my mom raped yerr foot

What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

Two black people fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? Who Cares?

A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

Knock Knock. Come in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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