Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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How do you starve a black family? Hide there government assistance card under their work boots!

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

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Flab

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Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

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what was sad about six black guys driving off a cliff in a cadallac? They were my friends

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

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If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

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Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

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Polly went out for a cigarette. Then she was raped.

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1 what do gay horses eat? 2 hayyyy 1 no horse dick

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What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

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A: Knock, Knock! B: Who's there? A: Boo B: Boo, who? A: Don't cry, it's only me!

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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Sex. That is all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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