di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

Do you need any assistance?

Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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