What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

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What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

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without laughing try to say " i hate bubble" with a dull face

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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The Charlotte bobcats.

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A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

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Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

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A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

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Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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What's the best position to be in while being attacked by a bear? invisible

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stappled to the chicken.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

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Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

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I have no ideas.

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Blonde Entrepeneurs

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What does a black man, an Asian Man, and a Jewish Man have in common? They are all men.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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