A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 1027

Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

Du bist mein Kampf

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

What's my name? I don't know i was asking u.

penis that is all

Matty B

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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