Christopher Walken to a bar.

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

Hey Patrick Yeah? I found something funnier then 24 Give it to me buddy 25

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

how do you kill jesus? with a knife

Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? Nay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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