A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

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im a selling a car

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

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what is black and white and red all over.....a nun being murdered

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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call of duty is how they say it, calla duty is how we say it...

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Blarg

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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What did the little girls who's parents died in a car accident get for her birthday? Foster Parents

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Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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Q: What did Mr. Spock say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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A man is lonely and calls a hooker. She goes to his house, pleasures him, and then demands 42 million dollars. The man shoots the whore and throws her body into a river.

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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Guess what's funny? People voting for their own Anti joke.

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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