What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

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why did Max cry??? chicken

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

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What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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my mom raped yerr foot

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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I have no ideas.

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

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what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

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Why do Jews circumcise their children.......because they like everything 10% off

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knock knock

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A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops