Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

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why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

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Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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BWAT

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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What did the boy do when he got locked out his house go on anti joke and make a stupid joke about him being locked out

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How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

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What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

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Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

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Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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69

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Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

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A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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