if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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A man. That is all.

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What's worse than finding a bone in your boneless chicken meal? Going home to find your entire family brutally murdered.

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Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

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penis

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I win an iPad for pooping on someone's head Answer- We have a muddaf**kin winna

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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What do you call 4 black people at a kfc? A family sitting down for there evening meal

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what do you get when you mix a bever and a racoon? A bevecoon!

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Two men walk into a bar, they weren't looking where they were going.

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What happened to the man that took too much viagra? His erection lasted longer than 4 hours, he's dead now

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

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Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

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yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

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Why was the fat person sad? Because he was fat.

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A: B: No pun intended.

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yo mamas so ugly she makes blind children cry

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

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Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

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How do you wake up your friend in a reasonable manor? you beat the shit out of him

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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