Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

How can you upset Helen Keller? In Braille spell out that she can't see or hear the hunger games

John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

What is the main contrast about different banks? None, they all take your money!

What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

What do you call your fist? Trying to talk to an appendage would indicate that you suffer from mental issues stemming from dysentery or lack of oxygen, and as a medical professional, I would recommend seeing a specialist.

What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

Why did phil krahn go to the store? To get one of those suits

Get your coat, I've got a knife.

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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