What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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What did the Muslim do after his friend told him a funny joke ? Laugh.

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There's no "i" in tim.

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baby loves lalma

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Paul Dylan King!

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Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

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Christopher Walken to a bar.

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a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

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h

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1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

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What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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