How so you find out if a black woman is pregnant? Have her take a pregnancy test

the guy on tv right now isnt funny. i blame canada

Hey! do you have any updog? Nothing much! you?

Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

what did the banana say to the apple i dont know because bananas dont talk

math test 2=2

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

Paul Dylan King!

what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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