What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the computer crash? Because the driver transporting the computer to his friend lost control of his vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do you call a stupid chav? Gifted

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If I was black, I wouldn't be white.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you get a emo kid out of a tree? cut him down get it: because he was depressed and so poor that he couldn't afford a hair cut or new clothes. he also had single mother whose boyfriend sexually abused him so he was confused about his sexuality. Then people just called him "emo" and said he was acting out so they ignored him and he never gave him help when he asked for it because they said he just wanted attention so he killed himself

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na equal? A lot of sodium

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops