What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did the fat kid break his leg? He got hit by a car

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One jew to screw in the light bulb.

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Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

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Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

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What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

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Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

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Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

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What did the priest get for Christmas? Herpes

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If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

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why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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"I love you, you love me" And you didn't just read that; you sang it.

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George Bush does not care about black people.

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What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

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What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

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"Up to 50% off."

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how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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