A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

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What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

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That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

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Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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69

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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