- Anti Joke

So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

What's the difference between a computer and a television?

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Knock, Knock Knock, Knock Knock, Knock No One's home.

Do you need any assistance?

Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

Ha

why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

poo poo you you doo doo too too

what is a big jar and has a human in it? A human in a jar.

A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

whats really hot the sun

A man walks into a bar. He says ow

a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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