What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall underwater? dam

thumb_up thumb_down -9

2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -11

hi. thats what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

knock knock. whos there?(haha ive never made my own joke before) Nick Nick who? Nick Saghir Oh, come in. Would you like some cookies?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the pilot suspended from flight? He was the terrorist who caused 911. OUCHH

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What does Pontiac stand for - People Of Normal Thinking Intelligence Acting Classy

thumb_up thumb_down -15

So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler. Good.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What starts with P and ends in O-R-N? Popcorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had a seizure.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops