A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

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What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

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Knock knock *runs away laughing*

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What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

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What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

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Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

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What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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roses are red, violets are violet

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Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

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how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

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What do you call a former pope. Dead!

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What's dead? Your mum.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

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How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

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What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops