Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

What is worse than being blind? Having a brain tumour.

What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

Why was Michelle crying? I don't know. Neither do I.

Mitt Romney for president.

whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

An eggo waffle had three friends that he will be inviting to his Superman birthday party. WHich friend will get the first piece of cake? Nobody the party was canceled.

Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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