OBAMA

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Yo Momma's So Fat... She tried Weight Watchers, and still gained weight... She hung herself last weekend.

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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why did the small child drop his icecream? he was hit by a bus

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A boss walks into a bar and hires the first man he sees. He fires everyone else, no matter what their occupation.

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roses are red violets are blue i hate black people

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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Lebron Traveled

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What did the man say to the homeless child. Where's you parents?

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You remind me of something. What? Summer Why because I'm hot? no because there is no class..

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An indian boy gets a girlfriend

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What is Earth made out of? Earth

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I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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whats difference between a bench and a mexican? a mexican isnt a bench

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

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A. I have a really funny knock knock joke to tell you! You start. B. Knock knock A. Who's there? B. ....

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how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

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Whats White and sticky? Semen

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dfghfgdfhfdhfgdfghdfh

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Wanted: A tall, well built woman with good reputation, who can cook Frog's legs, who appreciates a good Fuc- shia garden, classical music and tal- king with out getting too serious. Now read only lines 1,3, and 5

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Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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Why is a black man fat? Because he eats a lot.

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Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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