Knock knock. Come in. Okay.

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What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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People with the best sense of humor visit anti-joke.com.

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What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

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penis that is all

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Frown is a four letter word.

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Q: what happens when you throw a red rock into a blue lake? A: a splash.

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YOU SUCK RYAN V!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U SUCK BALLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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If someone throws a fridge at the boy then they must be exceptionally strong because fridges weigh more than the average human can lift therefor he has a good future ahead of him but will have to live with the fact that he hurt a small child

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Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

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lol

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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[Enter Funny-Anti Joke Here] [Enter Retarded Answer Here]

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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Why did the man walk into a bar? I don't know? Ask him. by Burflared

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BOOBIES!!!!!!!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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