really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

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Why are black people so good at sports? Because there black.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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why did the chicken cross the road Why not

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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save water shower with friends

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Thank you for booking with Anti-Joke Travel Agency. Here is your trip itinerary: 1. Your toilet

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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I can Nazi

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25

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Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

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Du bist mein Kampf

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

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A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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Why do black people call white people "Niggas"? Because they took an overdose of KFC and watermelon, they're actually just insulting themselves.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, it is unclear what the chicken's motivation to cross the road was.

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Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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